My boyfriend and I have been together a little over two months. He just finalized his divorce from a 3-year marriage a few days ago. The day the divorce was complete, his ex-wife told him she still loved him and wanted to try things again. They seperated 4 times in the three years they were married.
He told me he doesn't want her to be sad and he doesn't want to hurt her, but I am convinced she is just messing with his mind and trying to screw things up between us.
Should I give him time and space to sort things out? Or just continue letting this woman stay in the back of my mind..always wondering "is he wishing I was her right now?"
He told me he knows they were never meant to be together, that I am his soulmate, and I do think his love and affection are genuine. How do I ditch the ex-wife baggage myself if he has already? Thankfully, they have no children together to give him a reason to feel guilty on that level.
It doesn't sound like he *has* ditched the ex-wife bggage. Even if a marriage has been troubled or seems totally over, the actual divorce decree can stir things up emotionally for some folks. I would give him space for closure with his ex-wife. You deserve for him to be focussed on you in your relationship, not on her.
She probably is messing with his mind. It sounds like she's doing a pretty good job of it and that he's letting her. Lots of guys are suckers for a "poor pitiful me" story from a woman.
I think you should tell him that you will wait until she is out of his life before getting more deeply involved with him. If he is serious about his relationship with you, he will get things settled with his ex in a hurry.
Best wishes to you.
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